In which I am reminded that it's good to be a grown-up
0 comment Sunday, April 20, 2014 |
The other night I was standing outside the gym waiting for my ride home. Three undergraduate men came out the doors discussing their "get ripped" strategies.UG1: Dude, I'm totally gonna try to get a six-pack before this summer.UG2: Yeah man, me too. But I don't wanna try too hard. I'm just gonna work out a lot and it'll happen.UG3: Yeah, me too. 'Cause I totally wanna get laid, you know?UG2: Ooooohhhh, shiiiiiiiii......I must have shot them the hairy eyeball or something at that last remark because they all suddenly and simultaneously noticed me, a vagina, standing there in plain sight right next to them. To their credit, they were appropriately mortified, and after much blushing and squirming and embarrassed laughter one of them says to his buddies, "Uh, let's like walk away really fast."I briefly considered sharing with them some important advice. Namely, that washboard abs are not a golden ticket for getting into a woman's pants, and that they'd probably have much better odds if they worked on getting rid of the douchery rather than the ab-flab. I thought the better of it though, and just said, "Stay classy dudes!"I can't decide if I am encouraged that they were aware that they were being offensive/making asses of themselves, or disheartened that they seemed to think that their aspirations and motivations were some sort of big secret.Eh, I'm just glad I'm not in college anymore.